Comments on: Just Swinging http://www.polyamorousmisanthrope.com/2005/02/05/23/ Wielding the Stick of Grandmotherly Kindness Thu, 28 Aug 2008 04:02:58 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6.1 By: Great Blistering Barnacles http://www.polyamorousmisanthrope.com/2005/02/05/23/#comment-8 Great Blistering Barnacles Wed, 04 Apr 2007 06:34:11 +0000 http://www.polyamorousmisanthrope.com/?p=34#comment-8 Interesting post. I have been mulling over this one myself and have pretty much come to the same conclusions. Personally I think the problem comes in because the term polyamory covers so many relationship aspects that people from the one end of the poly spectrum find it difficult to comprehend the things that can be going on, on the other side. And polyamory doesn't just cover two extremes, it's more like a starfish so the moment you get your head around two sets of extremes, you learn that there are people who don't even remotely fall into the categories you have so neatly created for yourself. But, this is life so we all want to find the big answers to the mysteries around us and one thing I can think of is that people associate swinging with monogamy. Wild concept but, for a lot of people swingers are all monogamous couples (or single females that are allowed to get into swingers venues for free) that swing as a recreational activity. After they have done their thing they go back to their monogamous lives. Clearly not all swingers fall into this category but, the stereotype is out there. And if they seem monogamous by day, surely they must be and therefore they cannot be truly polyamorous(tm). Interesting post. I have been mulling over this one myself and have pretty much come to the same conclusions. Personally I think the problem comes in because the term polyamory covers so many relationship aspects that people from the one end of the poly spectrum find it difficult to comprehend the things that can be going on, on the other side. And polyamory doesn’t just cover two extremes, it’s more like a starfish so the moment you get your head around two sets of extremes, you learn that there are people who don’t even remotely fall into the categories you have so neatly created for yourself.

But, this is life so we all want to find the big answers to the mysteries around us and one thing I can think of is that people associate swinging with monogamy. Wild concept but, for a lot of people swingers are all monogamous couples (or single females that are allowed to get into swingers venues for free) that swing as a recreational activity. After they have done their thing they go back to their monogamous lives. Clearly not all swingers fall into this category but, the stereotype is out there. And if they seem monogamous by day, surely they must be and therefore they cannot be truly polyamorous(tm).

]]> By: Teresa http://www.polyamorousmisanthrope.com/2005/02/05/23/#comment-7 Teresa Wed, 28 Feb 2007 19:41:46 +0000 http://www.polyamorousmisanthrope.com/?p=34#comment-7 Yay! I like doing whatever makes me happy; sometimes "swinging", sometimes serious relationships, etc.. It's all poly to me, and usually the two mix together in surprising, yet natural ways. I love my friends, and sometimes I want to have sex with them, and sometimes I fall in love with them. Sometimes that attatchement lasts for years, sometimes just one day. I honestly think people's bad attitudes about swinging are based more on their western, fear-based, Judeo-Christian cultural upbringing. I also think that people have this picture in their minds of a bunch of older folks acting out some 70's porn flick, or something. And, I think people just have a hard time letting go of their lovers when it's appropriate to. "Swinging" often means having to let go pretty quickly. I think it takes a certain amount of maturity to be able to do that with goodwill and happy memories. Yay! I like doing whatever makes me happy; sometimes “swinging”, sometimes serious relationships, etc.. It’s all poly to me, and usually the two mix together in surprising, yet natural ways. I love my friends, and sometimes I want to have sex with them, and sometimes I fall in love with them. Sometimes that attatchement lasts for years, sometimes just one day.

I honestly think people’s bad attitudes about swinging are based more on their western, fear-based, Judeo-Christian cultural upbringing. I also think that people have this picture in their minds of a bunch of older folks acting out some 70’s porn flick, or something.

And, I think people just have a hard time letting go of their lovers when it’s appropriate to. “Swinging” often means having to let go pretty quickly. I think it takes a certain amount of maturity to be able to do that with goodwill and happy memories.

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