Comments on: Polyamory, FLDS and Cults

By: Holographic Heart

Holographic Heart — Fri, 09 May 2008 12:35:56 +0000

Group marriages are technically illegal, yes, but the fact is that most states do not pursue penalization of this offense unless something like child abuse or spousal abuse becomes an issue. And many people who consider themselves to be in a ‘group marriage’ are not necessarily married legally, but done so within a non-legally binding religious ceremony.

By: Goddess of Java

Goddess of Java — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 14:47:15 +0000

The legalities depend on the state.

I did not live in a state where anything we were doing was illegal when I had a group marriage.

By: Jettboy

Jettboy — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 14:43:39 +0000

If you think it is bad to be lumped in to a group that you disagree with because you do something they are renowned for, just think what it is like getting grouped in with them even when you don’t do what they are renowned for. I am tired of being a Mormon who is automatically assumed to be polygamous (the mainstream Mormons haven’t allowed polygamy for 100 years) simply because of break-offs and a history that did include the practice.

By the way, your lifestyle is illegal. You know that don’t you? It is illegal because the United States found it as a wedge against Mormons in the 19th Century.

By: Viktoria Whittaker

Viktoria Whittaker — Sat, 06 Oct 2007 11:41:17 +0000

Thank you so much for posting this article! I was involved many years ago with a poly family that was profoundly unhealthy and showed all the signs of morphing into a cult. When I try talking to other poly people about it, I sense a deep denial involved. It seems that people want to think that all poly people are all loving healthy people with loving, healthy families and relationships. The truth is that we are no better or worse than anyone else, and no more or less likely to be in a dysfunctional relationship.

By: April

April — Mon, 01 Oct 2007 02:59:59 +0000

For all the possible ways to portray polyamory, Big Love does a pretty decent job of doing so (as far as Bill and his 3 wives are concerned, the whole Juniper Creek compound is a whole other ball of wax). And the show has been doing some things to make it more socially responsible…..such as when Barb and family assisted the soon to be minor wife of Roman Grant in running away from that compound.

But these signs you listed are a good thing. However you could also apply them to all other relationships. The control issues you listed are also common types of spousal abuse. Emotional abuse, Financial abuse, and actual physical abuse are all common ways people are in unhealthy relationships. It is important to remember the warning signs and evaluate your relationships (whatever kind they may be) periodically.

By: Louis Adkins

Louis Adkins — Sun, 23 Sep 2007 20:25:16 +0000

What it really boils down to at all times is your level of freedom of choice. It’s okay to choose to live in a tightly-knit family. It only becomes not okay when you’re threatened if you want to leave, or if you are losing your own sense if identity, or if your children are being harmed.

This is so very true, and I am always glad to see this pointed out.