Category Archives: relationships
Thoughts on Being Used
Some years ago, I wrote an article called “Being Used.” It was about red flags in relationships, demands and whether or not you had a relationship or were being treated as a commodity. I feel like I neglected to point … Continue reading
Not at All Costs: there are times when you can keep working on the relationship
I’ve posted a series of columns lately where there is a gentle (or not so gentle) encouragement to get the hell out of a relationship. I bet you think this means that if there’s the slightest problem, I think you … Continue reading
Jack and Jill
About a year ago I met a man whom I had an immediate connection with (I still to this day cannot explain what made me feel so comfortable with him right off the bat as I am generally a reserved … Continue reading
How to Rebuild Trust
I stumbled across your blog while searching for resources on polyamory and STDs. Another question that someone asked was like what happened to me and encouraged me to talk to someone. My wife and I have been together for a … Continue reading
Unfuck Your Habitat
While certainly housekeeping is not poly-specific, the attitudes around housework and housekeeping can contribute to a happy poly household or rip it apart. May I present an option that might be of use to some of you: Unfuck Your Habitat … Continue reading
Overcoming Insecurities
How about some suggestions on working with your partner to overcome insecurities? Interesting question: and one that could be taken two ways. I’ll deal with the shortest first. If we interpret it as, “How can I fix my partner so … Continue reading
Trying to Break Us Up
What to do when a secondary female is trying get the primary male to breakup with the primary female in a polyamorous relationship? This was not an Ask the Misanthrope Question, but a search term that appeared to link to … Continue reading
Will a Baby Change my Poly Relationship?
Okay, go read the title. Then think a minute. Damn right one of your partners having a baby is going to change things. Jesus, where’s your brain? Reams of paper go out with printed whinging about fathers who feel jealous … Continue reading
Secondary Relationships Follow-up: They Ain’t All Bad
Yesterday, I posted a tongue-in-cheek collaboration between a couple of snarky, but very wise men who were expressing concerns about how secondaries are often treated. Is it funny? Yes. Will it make some people cry because it was true for … Continue reading
Are Polyamorous Relationships Hard?
There’s a common thread that I’m noticing in relationship talk that I’d like to address. It’s not necessarily polyamory specific, but I’ve never let it stop me before, so here we go: “Relationships are hard.” I first ran across this … Continue reading